How to DM someone on Discord & how to DM without being friends?
Written by: Hrishikesh Pardeshi, Founder at Flexiple, buildd & Remote Tools.
Last updated: Sep 03, 2024
To DM someone on discord,
- Open Discord and select the Discord icon at the top left corner
- Click the ‘Friends' button and go the ‘All' tab
- Find a user on this list and click on the their avatar
- In the textbox, enter the message you want to send and press the ‘Enter' key.
To DM someone on discord without being friends, if they've set message settings to 'Friends only',
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Through Common Channels in a Server:
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Go to a shared channel or group.
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Click on the person's profile icon.
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Type your message and press 'Enter' in the small text box.
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Through a Server Invite:
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Contact the person outside of Discord.
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Create a server invite link.
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Send them the invite link via email or text.
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Discord users predominantly make use of servers to communicate with one another when using it for gaming.
However, if you want to start a conversation with someone who isn't a member of the same servers as you, you can send a direct message (DM) to them.
When you wish to hold a private conversation with someone, you can use DMs and Group chats for friends.
We have written below a detailed guide on how to DM someone on Discord. We've also covered how to send a message to someone who's not your friend on Discord.
Table of Contents
What is a DM on Discord?
Private one-on-one conversations that you have with other users on Discord are called Direct Messages, or DMs, on Discord.
These cannot be read by other users on your Discord server and you can send them even if they are not on the same server as you are currently using.
If you have any confusion around how to send a DM on Discord, whether you are using a PC, Mac, iOS, or Android device, do read the following article to find out!
How to DM someone on Discord?
Here's a detailed guide on how to message someone on Discord:
Note that some users can set their DM settings to ‘Friends only', meaning that you won't be able to DM them unless you are on their ‘friends' list.
On PC or Mac:
DM a friend:
- Log in to Discord and click on the Discord icon at the top left corner. You will be able to see the ‘Friends' button, click on it.
- Click on the ‘All' tab and you will see the names of all your friends on Discord.
- If you wish to send a message to a user who is online, click on the ‘Online' option beside the ‘All' option.
- You can click on the user you want to send a DM to from this list. Clicking on the user will open a direct message between you two.
- Here, in the text box, enter the message you want to send and press the ‘Enter' key.
How to DM someone on Discord in a common server
- Open Discord and select a server
- Find a user whom you want to DM from the list of all the members on the server
- Right-click on their name and choose ‘Message'
- In the textbox, enter the message you want to send and press the ‘Enter' key.
- If you wish to DM a fellow member with whom you share a server, open the server by clicking on the server's name to the left of the screen.
- Here, on the right side of the screen, you will be able to see a list of all the members on that particular server.
- Locate the name of the user you wish to message, right-click on it, and select ‘Message' from the Dialog menu that pops up.
- Now, the direct message screen will open up, and you can enter your message in the text box and press the ‘Enter' key to send it.
On Android and iOS:
- Open Discord on your Android or iOS device, click on the menu button (the three white lines at the top left), and then the message icon at the top left of the screen.
- Select the friend you wish to DM from the list shown and you will be taken to the Direct message screen with that person.
- Here, you can enter the message you wish to send in the text box and press the arrow button to send the message.
- Alternatively, you can also go to the menu (the three white lines) and click on the ‘friends' icon at the bottom of the screen. You should be able to see a list of your friends.
- You can either click on the message icon to the right of the friend's username or click on the friend's name, then click on the ‘Message' option to open the direct message screen to text them.
How to message a group of friends in a Group chat
- You can add up to 10 members (including yourself) to a group chat. That means you can add 9 friends to a group chat.
- To do this, open the DM between you and a friend, and you should be able to see an ‘Add friends to DM' option at the top right of the screen.
- You can now type the username of other friends and select the ‘Create Group DM' option.
Can you send a message to someone who's not your friend on Discord
Whether you can or cannot DM someone who's not your friend on Discord, would depend on that user's privacy settings. As mentioned above, some users can set their DM settings to ‘Friends only', meaning that you won't be able to DM them unless you are on their ‘friends' list by sending a friend request.
This is a feature under the ‘Privacy and Safety' settings on Discord, aimed at giving users a safe and good Discord user experience. It enables users to chat without trolls, spam, or otherwise annoying messages. Of course, this can bar you from messaging someone who's not your friend on Discord.
‘Friends only' is the default setting on Discord, and unless the user has changed their settings, you will not be able to DM them.
So, what can you do about this?
If you are confused about how to DM someone on Discord when they are not a friend, do read on to see your options!
How to send a message to someone who's not your friend on Discord?
Through common channels in a server
If you want to DM someone on Discord who's not a friend, the easiest way of doing so would be through common servers and channels.
- Open the channel/ group that you both are a part of, as you will not be able to DM someone who's not in the same group as you.
- Click on the profile icon of the person you want to DM.
- You can type a private message in the small text box as shown above. and press the ‘Enter' key.
- Now, you will be redirected to the Direct Message screen between you and this user, and you can see that the message sent through the text box is shown in this DM.
Through a server invite
To use this method, you'd first need to contact the person you wish to text outside of Discord and send them the invite link.
- Go to the channel on the server you wish to invite members to, and click on the ‘Create invite' icon (person with the + sign).
- You will now see a popup with a link through which you can invite other users to the server.
- The link expires in 7 days, but you can set it to never expire.
- Now, you can copy this link and send it to the people you wish to invite to the server, through mail or text.
FAQ
1: What is a DM on Discord?
A: A DM on Discord stands for Direct Message, which refers to private one-on-one conversations between users.
These messages cannot be read by other users on your Discord server, and you can send them even if the recipient is not on the same server as you.
2: Can I DM someone on Discord if they're not on my friends list?
A: It depends on the recipient's privacy settings. If they have their DM settings set to 'Friends only,' you won't be able to send them a DM unless you are on their 'friends' list by sending a friend request.
However, there are alternative methods to contact them, as explained in the article.
3: How do I send a DM on Discord through common channels in a server?
A: To DM someone on Discord through common channels in a server,
- Open the shared channel or group where you both participate.
- Click on the profile icon of the person you want to DM.
- Type your private message in the small text box and press 'Enter.'
4: What is the process for sending a DM through a server invite?
To send a DM through a server invite:
- Contact the person you want to message outside of Discord.
- Create a server invite link from the channel you wish to invite them to.
- Send them the invite link via email or text.
5: How do I change my DM settings on Discord?
A: To modify your DM settings on Discord, you can go to 'Privacy and Safety' settings within your Discord account.
Here, you can adjust who can send you messages and friend requests, giving you control over who can contact you.
6: Can I send a message to multiple friends in a group chat on Discord?
A: Yes, you can create a group chat with up to 10 members, including yourself, on Discord.
To do this, initiate a DM with a friend and use the 'Add friends to DM' option to include others in the conversation. This allows for group messaging within Discord.
7: How do I start a private conversation with someone who's not my friend on Discord?
A: If you want to privately message someone who's not your friend on Discord, use the methods mentioned in the article, such as common channels in a server or a server invite, depending on the recipient's privacy settings.
These workarounds can help you initiate a conversation with them.
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